#5: The One with the Wellness Festival

How our personal battles prove to us that we can do the hardest things.

Jun 18, 2023

black and white chess piece — Photo by Piotr Makowski on Unsplash

Dear friend,

How are you? And how is your beautiful heart? Please take a moment to breathe and really reflect on that - maybe even placing both hands across your chest, focussing your energy and attention into your heart space, and directly asking that little beating machine inside of you that holds all of the answers: How are you?

You might be surprised at the answer. If anything comes up that you’d like to talk through, my inbox is open. You can also book a free healing consultation for therapeutic coaching here.💛

It’s been two weeks since I last wrote to you, not that I intended it to be so long. It’s just that last weekend I was exhibiting my art business, Beyond Henna, at a Wellness Festival and didn’t get a chance to sit down and write, and in the time since then, I’ve been harbouring a cold, a foggy brain and 0 energy. But it’s all good, as all of that ties in quite neatly with what I want to share with you today.

So grab a cuppa, get comfortable and let’s journey together.✨

Being a mother is frikkin’ hard. Well, it is to me anyway.

It’s like God answered my prayers to be close to Him and to become the best version of me that I can be, by throwing me headfirst into the world of parenthood and setting me atop the battlefield of the war with myself.

Parenting is a mirror. It has brought up all the unhealed parts of myself that need love and attention, with a blaring siren. It’s a tumultuous, inspiring, ego-breaking, spirit-destroying, joyful, arduous, enlightening journey that takes all of me; every ounce of all that I think I have left until something comes along that requires even more. It’s a rollercoaster, that’s for sure - and that’s putting it lightly.

I know for some this may come across as a little dramatic, but for me, this is my truth.

Being given the responsibility of taking care of three little lives, two of whom have some health issues, and trying to be the best, most conscious parent that I can be while also trying to honour myself, my creativity, my needs, my healing and my growth is the hardest thing I have ever had to do.

And that’s why, when the call arrived somewhere deep inside me to start putting my art back out there in the world through in-person events, although it excited me, it also awakened dark feelings of apprehension within me.

Having not done an event in over 3-and-a-half years, with a global pandemic, an up-and-down pregnancy and having become a mother of three during that time, I really questioned, on top of everything else that my husband and I have to handle on a day-to-day basis (and all night, too!), whether we could really do this.

Could we really go out there, do all the prep required, drive an hour+ there and back for three days in a row, set up, man the stand, apply henna and talk to other humans for the whole weekend while trying to take care of a 2-year-old that has his own health issues, while surviving on the minimal sleep that has become our norm and then come home to feeding, bathing and putting to bed three children and being faced with more nights of broken sleep?

Could we really do it? Could we really survive it?

And as much as I questioned it, the answer was always going to be yes.

Yes we could, and yes we did. Even though it took absolutely everything - every bit of strength and courage and willpower, and every last ounce of energy that we both had. But we did it.

And honestly? It really was worth it.

Aside from all the inspiring conversations I had, the beautiful people I met, the purchases made and the connections established, it was worth it because God showed me in those few days just how much I am really capable of. He showed me that I can do it. He proved to me that I am capable of the hardest things. And he reminded me, once again, that I must never, never, NEVER give up on myself despite all the challenges I face on a daily basis.

And I want this to be a reminder for you too, whether you believe in a Higher Power or not, and whether you refer to that Power as God or not.

We could never really know how strong we are and how much we are capable of until we are put in the situations that require us to become our strongest and most capable selves.

More often than not, we look to our personal battles as a burden. Sometimes we can feel like helpless victims waiting to be saved; we can continuously question why me, why us, why this? All we want is to be free of all that has seemingly ensnared us, we want to escape the prison cell that has locked us within it, and locked the world - and life - out.

But what if, what if we decided to change the lens through which we view our situation? What if we were able to welcome our personal battles, embrace them and maybe even learn to be thankful for them?

“Change the way you look at things and the things you look at change.” ~ Dr Wayne Dyer.

A few months ago, I was listening to an online spiritual talk, in which the speaker shared the idea that “bad things don’t happen to good people”. And this resonated with me a lot.

When you come to fully embrace the human journey, you come to the knowing that all that is happening to you is happening for you.

Your personal battle may come packaged as ‘bad’, but perhaps that ‘bad’ is really a blessing in disguise. Perhaps that ‘bad’ is going to lead you on the path to becoming the best version of yourself that you can be. Perhaps that ‘bad’ is making you the best version of yourself that you can be.

Think of your own life for a moment. Think back over all the battles you’ve been in, all the challenges you’ve faced. Loss, grief, loneliness, depression, health issues, financial stress, spiritual crises… the list is endless, and of course, you may have experienced all of these at one time or another.

But now think of all the times you’ve been tested, and the strength you cultivated that carried you through.

Think of all the times when you didn’t think you could do something, but you somehow did it anyway.

Think of all the times you thought you were broken beyond repair, but still managed to get up and carry on going.

Think of all the times when it all felt like too much, but you still survived another day.

You did that because you are CAPABLE OF THAT. And you would have never known you were capable of it, without the battle in the first place.

So perhaps the battle isn’t really a curse at all. Perhaps the battle is a gift.

Share Letters of Love & Light ✨💛

Linking into all of this, ‘Sabr’ is an Arabic word that I grew up with which is commonly translated to mean patience. I was always told throughout my early years when a situation tested me, “Have Sabr, have Sabr, have Sabr”.

Having grown older and (a little) wiser, I would say a far more accurate translation of Sabr is perseverance. Perseverance in the face of our struggles; perseverance for all that life serves up. It’s like having the patience to endure whatever you are going through while persevering to better the situation and yourself in the process.

Sabr has saved me many, many times (especially now as a mother) and for me, it is a state of Being that has the power to shift our perception and our entire lives.

You can read a full article I’ve written on the subject called ‘The Art of Sabr’ by clicking the button below👇🏼

The Art of Sabr

Having Sabr has gotten me through some of my darkest and most difficult days. Here are 5 things that have helped me, that could help you to cultivate more Sabr in your own life too:

Giving gratitude for absolutely everything - the ‘good’, the ‘bad’ and everything in between. It all appears in your life for a reason.

Remembering that “this too shall pass” - just as everything does and will

Asking yourself what you can learn here - what is this experience teaching you about yourself, about life, about other people or about a certain situation

Understanding that you are a spiritual being having a human experience and that the challenges you face are all a part of that experience

Believing that you are not alone in your struggles and that God is with you, and sees, hears and knows all

Yes, motherhood is a struggle. Yes, some days I just don’t want to do it anymore and want to disappear to a place where nobody needs me or wants me. Yes, some days I just don’t see myself getting through the day, let alone another night of broken sleep.

But what I understand now is that motherhood and its all-consuming nature would have to be the place where I would be stripped down, beaten and broken, and then raised up, healed and stronger than I ever could have been without it.

It’s safe to say that I’m simultaneously being broken and healed, beaten and strengthened all at the same time - and it is all creating a stronger, more resilient, more powerful, more beautiful, more conscious and more empowered human being.

I pray that more and more of us learn to see the blessings in our battles. And I pray that more and more of us are able to bear witness to our own growth through our battles.

After all, it is our most difficult battles that prove to us that we can do the hardest of things.

Sending you strength, my friend.

And as always, lots of love, light and peace from my heart to yours,

Sabah x

#5: The One with the Wellness Festival

How our personal battles prove to us that we can do the hardest things.

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